Memberi seluruh cintamu kepada seseorang bukanlah jaminan Dia akan membalas cintamu. Jangan diharapkan balasan cinta, tunggulah hingga cinta berkembang di hatinya, tetapi jika tidak, berbahagialah kerana cinta tumbuh di hatimu...

Blues untuk aku...

Kita sering menganggap setiap satu tradegi buruk yg menimpa kita sebagai titik hitam dalam sejarah hidup kita. Tanpa berfikir panjang, kita terus menganggap titik hitam itu sebagai penghalang untuk terus mengharungi hidup dengan lebih cemerlang. Seterusnya kita akan gagal untuk mencari apa yang patut dicari sebaliknya menemui apa yang tidak sepatutnya lantaran kejahilan kita memahami hakikat hidup...
"Jadi la" "Okay La" "Boleh La" sering menjadi antem kita. Secara tidak langsung sedikit demi sedikit mengikis kewibawaan kita. Demi sedikit kita tak konfiden dengan Qada' dan Qadar Allah....
Kita terpengaruh dengan propaganda asing. "Enjoy" "Cool" "Life sucks" menjadi fahaman kita. Gaya hidup inilah yg kita ter' landas. Kita menjadikannya landasan dalam menjalani kehidupan kita.
Tapi pernah tak kita terfikir, landasan itu ke mana arahnya? Apakah kita semakin mengenal Tuhan atau lebih jauh tersasar dari tuntutan hak? Atau juga untuk kita tahu yg inilah dia realiti kehidupan. Andai kita tersalah tafsir, semakin jauh kita dariNya.
Meminjam kata-kata UMAR ALKHATTAB, "Tidak akan kamu berperasaan gundah walaupun sekali, jika kau tahu apa yang dicari."
Maka dalam kehidupan ini, apa yang sebenarnya kita cari?

- Kata-kata TEMBAKAU, penulis Kartini...

3 months have pass in Police Academy.
Life is okay...Well it's fun but till today.
It seems that there is not much any interesting events in my life for now.
Everyday monday to friday I spend my time at PA.
Every night reading books and listening to cds.
One night I was listening to this Smashing Pumpkins cd and the songs are really so depressing.
I felt lonely but that's okay i've been feeling lonely since then.
But this one is different.It's like eating me up slowly.
The next day, I was talking to my squadmate.
And we suddenly talk about who already have a girlfriend.
Then we realized about all of them has one.
There are some that doesn't have any but there are mostly seeing different girls.
Then he asked me "What's the matter with you?"
I don't know why I don't have a girlfriend.
I wanted to have a relationship but I don't have the courage to.
Every night I hear my friend talking to their girl.
Sometimes i feel sad.

I feel so sad nowadays.Sometimes it's unbearable.
It's so depressing.I hope I'm not the next one committing suicide.
Relationship is that what I lack of.
3 months later the guys gonna go separate ways
I will be posting to different divisions.
I know that later on we're gonna drift apart again.
The cycle begins.

give me a cryknife and i poke my knee to death.
i am so freaking myself.
this is called self inducing freekiness.
and i had lost my spelling bee.
please come back to me speeling bee. i do not want to have spelling errors no more.
and my grammar is dead. Is I am not talking correctly did i not?

The Seven Mystical Questions?
beginning "Who is it that thinks?"
My flying cat.
End.

After much thinking, i have concluded that i am weird. i am living in a mystical world of similulitudes where all physical limitations are removed. Therefore I'm sleeping right now.....Zzzzzzzzz

It seems that someone had cast a Haste spell to our time space continuum.
But then again life is so mundane. Where have this excitement in speed gone through?
Speed is an evil conconction.and Fear is the little death.
But where is my socks?

My inner thoughts for now.
"............shit........what da?........damn.....is that a cat?......shit.....it must be a cat.........but can a cat fly?.......i don't think so.......hey that is a nice looking balloon.........arghhh!..........that seems to hurt. mental note to a mental note.......do not place fingers between doors when shutting them...........especially when you're just coming out from the toilet...........shit happens.............i hope i did not flush my brain down the toilet................it seems that i'm typing non sense..........i do not condone this kind of action............Zzzzzzzzzzzz.........a flying cat.........i'm sure it's a flying cat.....Zzzzzz.......ouch my fingers hurts........."

Moral of the story. Never have a blog if you can't maintain them.