It is so much fun playing in the water.
Splash! Splash!
My instructor brought us for dragonboatting *if there is such a term?
Kewl!
This is way better than running 5km.
Firstly I don my high tech state of the art lifejacket with all the cool gadgets
such as auto-drying, bouyancy control and muscle extention.
Okay,so it was just a normal lifejacket.
After that I take my oars, belongs to AN ancient mariner.
See how cool it is when i blow up things to a might exponantial rate?
With that oars i paddle the River of Kallang with mighty haste.
Though weary with age, i paddle with great wisdom.
Together me and my crew *ahah! we paddle with unity.
We flow like the wind. Beating the waves are nothing compared
to battling sea monsters and ancient beings in the River of Kallang.
War crys are let out. We are the ancient king of mariner!
The Rime of Ancient Mariner we sang!

It is an ancient Mariner,
And he stoppeth one of three.
"By thy long grey beard and glittering eye,
Now wherefore stopp'st thou me?

The ship was cheered, the harbour cleared,
Merrily did we drop
Below the kirk, below the hill,
Below the light-house top.

And now the Storm-Blast came, and he
Was tyrannous and strong:
He struck with his o'ertaking wings,
And chased south along.

"God save thee, ancient Mariner!
From the fiends, that plague thee thus! --
Why look'st thou so?" -- With my cross-bow
I shot the Albatross.

Nah! We are just some clumsy bunch to try out dragonboat.
We can't even sail straight.
Haha!
But With the words of Ancient Mariner.
We shall be one.
But please not a dead one.

Forgot to update this down.
Last saturday went to Youth Park to watch some bands competing in the Asian Beats.
Went late. Around 8pm i guess.
Witness some good talented musicians.
Musically inclined!
Whoa!
Some bands are really great.
Seems like a gig rather than a competition.
There is this band called B quartet or something.
My friend said that they're all cousins.
They played good music! really good music.

But there is this kid in one of the other bands.
He is only 12yrs old and played drums better than some 20++ yrs of age.
Super!

If only i can be a ROCKSTAR!

Everyone is a living legend

I went by to HMV for a while to check out some cds.
While checking I saw this movie called ALI acted by Will Smith.
So I stand by the screen for about an hour i think.
I wanted to finish the whole movie but dude was whining asking me to get out already.
Heh I know. I'm lame but Hey! its free movie man.
Without popcorns and all but it will do.

Then the whole day i talked about ALI the world champion boxers ever.
He is the greatest man. He knows how to talk trash to intimidate his opponents.
He is a living legend i say. He is.
Then me and my friend were talking and i ask this question.
Me: Selain Mohammad Ali, siapa ah living legend cam dia? English, Doc!English(Other than a living legend like Mohammad Ali, who is?)
Fauzi: Aku! (Me!)
Me: Kalau gitu aku pun boleh cakap aku living legend bangang! please speaking english(I also can call myself a living legend, asswart!)
Fauzi: Habis! (Then!)

To think of it, everyone is a living legend.
Why? Everyone has been battling their own wars.
Their own personal mind battle.
And mostly have won.
Nobody can help us except ourself.
Those who won can call themselves a hero.
A hero of his own.
We are all heroes. We are all a legend of ourself.

Ps. Kurt Cobain is a dead legend.
This is out of topic. But sure damn i love Nirvana.
Read an article about them. About most of the secret stash of Nirvana
such as their 107 unreleased tapes.
All holded back because of his wife Love.
I don't know why but Krist and Dave have agreed to released them
but Love just playing crazy.
Insane man.
And yeah Krist will be playing again in his new band.
I forgot already.

One of favourite pranks

#003 ALARM CLOCK. By The Last Viking.

Once there was a guy who left his sack unattended during the break at
school. Well, the alarm-clock from hell was put into the back, in a location
where he wouldn't look, just before a lecture. Gee, did he get the looks
when it rang in the midst of the lecture [there was 150-200 people in the
room.]

There is still some courtesy left in Singaporeans.
Today I witness something that makes me smile.
Do you know that during the peak hours, you can never find a seat in the MRT?
Once they saw an empty seat, they will try to get it.
By pushing and shoving other people out of the way.
Without thinking about others.
Even standing in front of them is an elderly person or a pregnant woman.
But today is a special day.
There was this couple. A normal one it seems.
Till something that they did that make them special.
I was standing at the mrt door when i see this.
I was dead tired after a "hard day work"
But I was tired anyway.
This couple saw an elderly man across the cabin.
This old man was, i think a cabin away from them.
And then this dude stand up from his seat and walk towards this old man
and giving a sign to him to take his seat.
Whoa!
And the old man sat beside this dude girlfriend or wife. i do not know.
But what matter is that is quite a scene.
I was tired but after seeing that moment
It gave me somekind of a spirit.
That kinda thing just make me smile.

Macam ExtraOrdinary People moment!

Do you people wanna know more about pranks involving letterboxs?
This is heavy you know.

So from now on I declare FRIDAY + SATURDAY + SUNDAY
to be my movie marathon Day. Or should i call Days.
From now on I will borrow DVDs to satisfy my appetite for information.
Not solely for entertainment. But for information. Pure raw information.
For information is power.
Do you know that in every movie there is some kind of hidden message.
Think Subliminal.
In every movie there is a hidden agenda.
These so called directors are some kind of anarchist driven by another.
Through movies they convey THE messages.
Only idiots will understand them.



Arm yourself with information before it gets illegal.

Hei!
The comments boxs is giving me hell of a time.
what gives?

Some more pranks.
Heh.

Call your mark in the middle of the night, and let the talk develop into
something like this:

You : "Hello, who is this?"
Mark: "Huh? What is this? Who are you?"
You : "Why did you call me at 3AM? Who is this?"
Mark: "What are you talking about? You called me?"
You : "RIIGHT? Very funny. Who is this?"
Mark: "I didn't call you. It was you who called me. Who is this?"
You : "Hey, I have work tomorrow. I need to sleep. Who is this? I will call
the police and the phone company about you. I have a caller ID"
[click]

Now this requires some good acting, and remember that things might turn out
slightly different, so don't use the text above as a script.

--

Call the mark in the middle of night - 5 AM is great. Ask him if he want to
buy an encyclopedias of your own choice. Just pretend to be a hyper active
telemarketeer who doesn't know there's such a thing as time-zones.

--

I paged my mark and left another pager number. Then paged a few more people
and left his pager number. At the end, half of the office was paging each
other and my mark got yelled at.

--

Get your marks phone number and get a hold of a beeper exchange. Page 100's
of people to the marks house at 2am on a weeknight. They will never get to
sleep. This takes time, and be wary of call tracing. But, it's worth it when
you see the bags under thier eyes the next day at work

Pranks to do with you friend

Carve off small pieces of rubber from an eraser. Remove some of the tobacco
from a cigarette. Put the rubber in as a substitute, then make it look real
by adding some tobacco on the tip. Rumors has it that it taste awful.
Heh.

PayDay is still another weeks to go.
and i'm inches away to pauper.
And so help me God.

Today have been my most embarrasing moment.
In fact it's happened twice.
Not ONCE but TWICE!
I was on my way in the train towards Kallang
and my stomach is full of gas.
That is not so cool.very not cool.
I was trying to control it but attempt was futile.
I told myself, "I have the power to control this. this is just a state of mind.
i must not let it control over me. those sweats are just illusions.
Let it pass slowly and everything will come to a perfect end.

But no!
The train suddenly jerked when it reached somewhere city hall station.
And my Mr. anus could not control his mouth.
And all hell break lose.
The sound was quite a BLAST !
I knew i was in a big sHIT.
I couldn't control myself.
I could feel the seats vibrating. Vibrating mind you.
I could feel the heat on my face out of the embaressment.
When the train reached Kallang, i remain cool and regain composure.
and happily walk out as if nothing happened.
But i knew everyone heard it.
Those eyes and those weird slanting smile on their face.

P/s: Do not eat bananas and milk for breakfast. I say do not!
But for the thrill seakers, go ahead and have the fun time of your life.
Thank you.
w00t!

i need to go out and meet new people.
Before this clock reached to zero,
I'm GROUND ZERO man!

i have achieved nothing?

what did i do for the past few years?
all the things i do just ridicules me.
i am a walking idiot sometimes.
sometimes i feel do i gain respects from my peers?
Or am i just a passerby in their life?
Questions arise....
What have i become?
What am i going to do?
What can i do?
I don't want to be a loser.

I do not want people to call me crazy or anything.
that is not my true nature.
i'm actually a quiet type.
I don't like to talk too much.
And i hate people who talk too much.

people always think that i like to joke around and make a fool out of myself.
its not that i am funny or a fool or anything.
to me what i do is just normal.
i don't go around doing jokes.
i am like that.
In the end people take that as a weakness and think that they can "makan" me.
what the fuck is this man?

Why do people always judge people by the exterior?
why do people judge other by just having small talks?
why?

I AM SAD!
PLEASE HELP ME PLEASE!

i know i will be getting the same old thing.
it will always be the same old answers.
please accept the fact shall i?

all these time
the words in here
all those words,
all the comments.
is that me?
or just my split personality?


i am not being emo or anything.
i am just another numbnuts.

I guess people who talks too much doesn't really shows what's really deep inside them.
They talk alot but i think that is just an act.
I think deep inside they're just empty.
I hate people who talks too much anyway.

But at twenty years of age
In frolic and in rage
I will see it through in time

But at thirty years of age
Through frolic and in rage
All regressed and healed in time

I’ll be here awhile ain’t going nowhere
Said I, said I, said I
I will survive

I'm free as I stare at the sea.
And I'm not comin' down.
The world is yours once you have found.
The good is to share.
Which is elsewhere.

Let's think of all the good times
Instead of wish we could times
So much better that way
This is what I ask for
This is what I deserve
Be careful what you ask for

I may not know a lot about politics, but I do know that they're all the same. The government wants us to be at each others throats, and they want us divided. We need to educate ourselves about each other. If we remain blind, don't speak up, and remain deaf to the truth.... we will be nothing more than a pawn in the governments game. They feed on our fear, and control us with a religion that has a lot of missing pieces. Have faith in yourself, no one else. Love each other... we are all beautiful in our own way.
Peace, Love...

Hey, mister go away, ‘cause if you won’t I guess this will be your last day!
Yeah! I am hot, I am on fire. Oh Shit, I burned a hole in my front tire!
My tire’s blown but I’m not blue ‘cause there is no one who can tell me what to do!
Just let me say before I die: That’s my way of life!

Come on and join me in going crazy. Don’t give a shit for what the other people say!
It’s a feeling like stormy water. No time for worries, just kick ‘em all away!

Stop! The traffic light is red! Breaking, standing, waiting makes me sad!
Don’t waste my time, I wanna move. I’ve got a watch from Casio, it is waterproof!
I’ve got enough, that’s it so far! I’m in the right mood now to break down every bar.
Well good idea, no when? and why? And it doesn’t matter if it’s day or night.

Once upon a time, a perfect man and a perfect woman met.
After a perfect courtship, they had a perfect wedding. Their life
together was, of course,perfect. One snowy, stormy Christmas Eve,
this perfect couple were driving their perfect car along a winding
road, when they noticed someone at the side of the road in
distress. Being the perfect couple, they stopped to help. There
stood Santa Claus with a huge bundle of toys. Not wanting to
disappoint any children on the eve of Christmas, the perfect
couple loaded Santa and his toys into their vehicle. Soon they
were driving along delivering the toys. Unfortunately, the driving
conditions deteriorated and the perfect couple and Santa Claus had
an accident. Only one of them survived the accident.

Question: Who was the survivor? (Scroll down for the answer. Trust me, it's worth it)






















Answer: The perfect woman survived. She's the only one who really
existed in the first place. Everyone knows there is no Santa Claus
and there is no such thing as a perfect man.


**** Women stop reading here, that is the end of the joke. ****
Men keep scrolling.





















So, if there is no perfect man and no Santa Claus, the woman must
have been driving. This explains why there was a car accident.

By the way, if you're a woman and you're still reading, this
illustrates another point:

Women never listen

I learn new words these few days.
" Muka Jin Kopak Dinding "
The rest you don't wanna know.
But I have a habit saying "this one more craziee man"
I need help!

It’s time again, impatience rules my mind
my hands are getting wet, it is the greatest pleasure I can find
I know my number’s gonna win tonight
got my pencil and the leaflet and now everything’s alright
A new car, a big house and holidays abroad
those things I’ll be able to afford
One day I‘m sure ‚ I’II win a million or more
everybody will see that I’m a VIP
all my worries all day will be gone far away
and I’m sure finally I’m the man I want to be.
Yeah!

Horz Porz Man!
Horz Porz memories is coming to my mind.

Sometimes it seems nothing goes and everything sucks
Like a bad dream, hey what a fuck
And then I think, there must be something
Stopping me being bored
Suddenly a lightning, there was a thing I’ve never seen before
It was a bottle small and thin
In which was oil or water in
I opened it and there was power
I grapped the bottle and I took a bit from it
It was a good feeling, but it tasted like fucking shit
Then I said to me “Who Cares?” and I drunk the rest
Suddenly started flying, tell you what, that was the best
I started like a rocket, flew down to Austria
But I couldn’t stop, so I came to Gambia
I said “I want to stop – Is there nothing I could do?”
Then I heard a voice from nowhere and it said “No!”

All things arranged now
All things will be prepared
One day, I guess, it will be ready for the day
No one’s complaining
It seems I lose control

Another story of a never ending life
Anyday I felt O.K. – it’s over now
I am the master of my life

I know the times when I’m lost and confused
I lose my control and I’ll find you
In the middle of our world
With no anger and pain
The story‘s out now – the life shield has gone away

I reach perfection
It seems to be complete
There’s nothing I can do, but parting in my seat
I’m not crazy – I just call “It’s true”
I’m just lazy

I look for attractions
They push me up so high
It seems like flying with Lambrusco to Hawaii

I will find you
With no anger and pain
The life shield has gone
The story’s out now

I heard a voice inside me
It told me that I was hungry
I looked around, I couldn’t see some food
So I went into, into a restaurant.
I found a table that was free
The other people stared at me
I got the card and realized
The prize was too high
They kicked me out and said “Good Bye”
Stop bad mood and eat some healthy fast food
Cheap and good,come let us eat some fast food
After that you will see, that there is nothing to regret
I heard a voice inside me
It told me that was happy
It was the best that I could do
Burgerking – you are, yes you’re surely the better way to go
When you see this restaurant
You’ll be fine and you will come

There´s a box with posters, pictures and some stuff.
It´s quite nice and so I can´t surely get enough.
Of this box full of posters, pictures and some stuff.
No one likes my box of papers.
Why?
No one likes it, ´cause my box is painted pink.
Why huh?
And I want my box full of papers.
And I want my box full of stuff.
And I want my box full of pictures.
And I want my box full of stuff.
I want to find this person, who took this box out of my life
So be there, when I find this rotten ugly person.
Evil!
EVIL i tell ya!

i am talking rubbish.
this one more crazy man.
vely vely dangelous i tell ya.

japanese toilets are difficult to understand i tell ya.
but anyway i have a hypothesis.
in every man there is stupidity
in every crowd of men there is creativy of stupidity
in every hierachy of men there is stupidity in ideas.
and yes this is not a hypothesis.
i do not know what this is all about.

If you're taking mrt every morning to work or school.
do not sleep late or do anything vigorously.
i say do not.
it will lead you to muscle spasm when you're sleeping
leg spasm while sleeping is funny to others
but not to yourself.

what are we going for?..

Let's laugh like me.
People say I laugh funnily.
It goes like this.
"Wargh Hah Hah Har Har Arh Arh ah"
Weird.

After watching Road To Perdition(Hell)
I feel like hugging my dad.
A great story with a sad ending.

Today Orientation for Police Coast Guard was a laughter!
It was so weird and quiet.
Everyone was like....Duhhh..Ahhh?...WhatDaF?.....
And I was like...Ermmm?...Hehahahaha.....WhatDaF?!.....Hahaha
The staff and officers over there was like Nelayan and ApekTongkang.
But one thing i've notice.
All the high ranking officers selekeh! GILER punyer....
Aiseyman.
Ingatkan bley pakai jadi smart2 cool2 man.
Selekeh siak.
After these 3 days orientation I will be undergo training for 1months for NPC and nautical training.
Fuh! Hardwork and brainkilling sessions.

Today I visit the Brani Division. Very ULU!
And went to Lim Chu Kang Base, Gul Base(situated at Tuas), Seletar(another ULU2 place) and also Kallang HQ.
I'm gonna be trained to become a nelayan commando.
Har HAr!
Selekeh siak aku!
Toot and WooT!

See ya guys again.
Now I've time to update this blog everyday.
Yay!

Happy 21st Birthday to fiZ.

I have awaken from my sleep.
A short sleep that was.
I am very restless now.
Any ideas for me to do today?
Please?

Saturday is a dead boring day if you have nothing to do.
So I will make a point to do something.
I will now sleep.
Zzzzz.zzZZz
No wait.
I should do something first before I sleep.
That is to smell my armpits.
Good day.

I'm still gawking at these 2 all time favourites flash movies.
The Mario Twins and the Ever Weird Jap Song with Mr Bean Face in it.
Maybe I will place it here.
Prepare to be braindead.

Maybe not now.
Maybe later.
Or tomorrow.
Or when I'm feeling like it.